Shaadi Dus Rupiah!

Today's theme of my blog is somewhat different and its come from observing the world around me more closely... tinkering my grey cells a little more in understanding the nuances of life, our culture and the whats and the whys of it.

Here we see is the perfect imbalance our culture has evolved, along with the "eternal bonding" of a guy and the gal... imperfect because while the couple accepts the each other tan and mann se... Indian marriages so very ensure that the "dhan" part is not left out. Well the case in point is the dowry system that so very exists in our culture.

Let me take you along to my world of analysis of this whole system...
Dowry, for the uninitiated, is the "token" money given by the parents of the girl to the guy's family along with the marriage. Now, this trend must have started long time back, in the archaic world of "prea-var, tum aa gaye"... "haan meri mumtaz, main aa gaya".

It was that time that the women did not work/earn themselves and so, the father, as a goodwill gesture gave some money, for she would be on the "demand side" while the supply side would be the same. OK! Maybe so!

However, the "best" part of culture is that it evolves in the very queer way. It wears away the true essence of its very existence and ensures the unwanted part to keep it afloat. Well, to put things in the right perspective, its like eating the fish and expecting the bones to do the swimming.

In contemporary times, more and more women have started to focus on their careers, their individualism, their identity and their contribution to the family and the world at large. The moot point is... is dowry still applicable in such situations? Is it justified to give away the stupendous amounts of money as "token" of donating your daughter (literally speaking, the kanyadaan")? Today, the woman of the family may even be earning more than her counterpart... so financially speaking, her Net Worth could be worth more than the guy... will the oh-my-GOD Finance geeks be ready to give a fair valuation of each individual?

Well, to be honest, I find marriages as the best example of "charity", that even Mother Teresa may suddenly want to marry each day of her life. Its like, you do all the hard work, you work all the days to make the event a success, and hey hey hey, its the "janta" that walks away with the fun and the life of the show.

So now I see why charity begins at home... aha!

And I, with no dearth of confidence can say that it is one custom, that sure has led to grave consequences. Is it a mere coincidence that states as rich as Punjab ( most famous for the great Indian weddings and the generosity with which they dole out on weddings) also has the most skewed sex ratios?

While expecting marriages to be totally based on present-value of Net worth of all future earnings capacity would mean the primary invitees be the CAs, CFAs, and MBAs (thank God I still am almost two of them, so even in that case, I would be employed), I do urge that marriages need to be more balanced, the rules be more contemporary.

The woman of today may fight it out at very level for the right to equality, removing the corporate glass ceiling and so on... well, this is one "glass tennis court" all the women of today's times have. A glass court in which they do not see that they have more than half of it. Putting things in a perspective, even if they have the ball in their court, unless the world of tennis has exact half courts, their aim to put the ball across the shorter other half of the court could just be as much more difficult, just as life is, when such inequalities exist.

Well, as they said... too much of everything is bad... so it really is.

Its a matter of pride, of dignity that we contribute equally to the very occasion that redefines our life. It is the first sign of equality in status, self respect that the couple might show to each other. Think about it... the experience of sharing it all cannot be more romantic.

Well, after all this, still, for the brains-like-a-baggage,
You know, there goes a saying...

A sheep heading an army of lions
can easily be defeated
by a
A lion heading an army of sheep...

So who do you want to follow? The sheep or the lion...

...
...
...
...

"As a guy and a finance stud(ent), I couldn't help myself thinking...

WHY EQUAL SPENDING IN MARRIAGES IS BENEFICIAL

The girl could also be spending more so as to acknowledge her 51% and above shareholding post marriage. Hence she has a management stake in everything and every decision thereafter and uses the "husband wife company" credit cards like redemption of everything"

So now I really wonder if its actually better to have a 50% shareholding? Else... the money you get early on would be a perfect case of "Haath ko aaya, muh na lagaa".